Ten days before Mick died he told me that he’d like to die at home rather than in the hospice where he was being looked after. For me, this was a very important request. In our earliest conversations about being prepared I’d promised Mick he could change his mind about anything at anytime and I would do everything in my power to make that change happen. So as difficult as this might be, I said I’d do my very best to get him home.
He felt really confident that he would not be in any pain at home. He hadn’t suffered any pain for weeks. If something flared up, I had everything I needed on hand and we were only half an hour away from the Marie Curie on-call team.
When Mick came home, it was quite scary knowing that there would be no nurses or doctors around – there was only me. We had carers who came in two times a day to help me. We were also assigned an overnight carer who would be there for Mick so that I could get some much needed rest. The hospice told me I could call them anytime day or night if I needed to.
At home, it was quite scary knowing that there would be no nurses or doctors around – there was only me.
Getting care at home
We had to fight to get the care at home that we needed. Quite honestly, it was a difficult process. But the care team at the hospice helped us sort this out. We got a 12 week care plan approved. This involved an overnight carer three or four nights a week, two carers twice a day, hospice at homecare, and a district nurse every morning.